{"id":6018,"date":"2022-01-03T19:21:24","date_gmt":"2022-01-03T19:21:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/psychology\/how-to-manage-an-infidelity-8-tips-to-get-over-it-emotionally\/"},"modified":"2022-01-03T19:21:24","modified_gmt":"2022-01-03T19:21:24","slug":"how-to-manage-an-infidelity-8-tips-to-get-over-it-emotionally","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/psychology\/how-to-manage-an-infidelity-8-tips-to-get-over-it-emotionally\/","title":{"rendered":"How to manage an infidelity?  8 tips to get over it emotionally"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"\">\n<p><strong>One of the most complicated situations that a couple can go through is the infidelity of one of the members<\/strong>.  A love affair is conceived in monogamous relationships as the violation of an affective and sexual agreement previously established by the two individuals that make up the couple.<\/p>\n<p>Historically, many societies have condemned polygamy.  Paradoxically, infidelity in couples has been common throughout history.  The breakdown of the pact of trust and loyalty with the partner can be caused by different factors ranging from the individual's personality, dissatisfaction or boredom in the relationship, the need for attention and love or poor communication with the partner.<\/p>\n<h2>What do we understand by infidelity?<\/h2>\n<p>The concept of infidelity is not without controversy, as it is subject to both individual and social considerations.  In this way, there are those who only recognize as infidelity that which involves sexual intercourse.  However, others believe that an affective relationship of an erotic nature (even if there is no sexual contact) already supposes a breakdown of fidelity towards the couple.<\/p>\n<p>This variability in what is considered infidelity and what is not is also related to the way in which each couple deals with a situation of this type. <strong>Many wonder if an infidelity can be overcome without the couple breaking up, but the truth is that this depends on the codes and limits that the two people have established in their relationship<\/strong>.  Sometimes continuing is possible, but sometimes separation is the best solution for the well-being of both of you.<\/p>\n<p>In any case, digesting the news that our partner has been unfaithful to us is very hard and triggers deep feelings of sadness, disappointment and even anger in us.  Making ourselves aware that the person we love and trust has failed us completely changes our image of them, and sometimes this pain can be difficult to overcome.<\/p>\n<p>A lot of people have found themselves in a situation like this.  If this is your case and <strong>you do not know how to manage the infidelity that you have suffered<\/strong>In this article we will give you some keys to handle this fact in the best possible way.<\/p>\n<h2>How can I overcome my partner's infidelity?<\/h2>\n<p>As we have commented, managing an infidelity is not an easy task.  Regardless of whether the couple survives this blow or not, the first moments are hard for those who have been cheated on, as very intense emotions and a lot of pain emerge.  Let's know some keys to handle this situation.<\/p>\n<h3>1. Don't blame yourself<\/h3>\n<p>When we discover that our partner has cheated on us, the first impulse leads us to think about what we have done wrong to make something like this happen.  We may think that we have not been sufficiently involved, that we do not deserve to be loved or that the fault of what has happened is ours.  As you can imagine, these types of thoughts are extremely harmful to self-esteem.  Do not shift the responsibility of infidelity on your shoulders, because the only person who should bear it is the one who has committed it.<\/p>\n<p>In addition, infidelity can be caused by a myriad of reasons, many of them unrelated to the person who has been cheated on.  Therefore, <strong>having suffered an infidelity does not mean that you are less valid or that you have made a mistake<\/strong>.  Many times, the person who is unfaithful has a personality with a tendency to get bored or need attention, or is simply not cut out for monogamous relationships.  Therefore, nothing your partner does will be enough to keep him faithful in the relationship.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"\"><picture>\n    <span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:inline-block;overflow:hidden;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;position:relative;max-width:100%\"><span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:block;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;max-width:100%\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" style=\"display:block;max-width:100%;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0\" alt=\"\" aria-hidden=\"true\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMjUwNyIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxNjczIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciIHZlcnNpb249IjEuMSIvPg==\"\/><\/span><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"overcome infidelity\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\"\/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"overcome infidelity\" src=\"https:\/\/medicoplus.com\/_next\/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fplustatic.com%2F6674%2Fsuperar-infidelidad.jpg&amp;w=1280&amp;q=75 1x\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\" loading=\"lazy\"\/><\/noscript><\/span><\/p>\n<\/picture><figcaption>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<h3>2. Maintain self-care<\/h3>\n<p>Once you have received the news, it is important that you give yourself some time to process it and think about what you want to do with your relationship. <strong>Making a decision under the influence of the first emotions is not correct<\/strong>as you will feel overwhelmed and will not be able to think clearly.<\/p>\n<p>To organize your ideas it is essential that you take a few days to take care of yourself.  Try not to stop your routine or your occupations, because maintaining normality as much as possible will help you to disperse your attention on other things and avoid mental exhaustion.<\/p>\n<h3>3. Limit time for reflection and sadness<\/h3>\n<p>As is to be expected, experiencing sadness and pain after discovering that our partner has been unfaithful to us is very normal.  However, it is essential that sadness and rumination do not invade all your time, as this will only contribute to aggravating the situation.  Going around an issue indefinitely is not productive and will prevent you from dealing with the situation in a healthy way.  Try to establish a defined time in the day to reflect and think.  Outside of that time <strong>try to go about your daily routine and activities without thinking about it anymore<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<h3>4. Lean on your environment<\/h3>\n<p>As always when a difficult situation occurs, the support of those around you is essential.  Try talking to your family and friends about how you feel, what you think, and what worries you.  Even if they can't decide for you, expressing your emotions and venting will help ease the discomfort.  In addition, it is a good idea that you can do pleasant activities with them that allow you to clear your mind and disconnect.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"\"><picture>\n    <span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:inline-block;overflow:hidden;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;position:relative;max-width:100%\"><span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:block;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;max-width:100%\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" style=\"display:block;max-width:100%;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0\" alt=\"\" aria-hidden=\"true\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMTIwMCIgaGVpZ2h0PSI2NzQiIHhtbG5zPSJodHRwOi8vd3d3LnczLm9yZy8yMDAwL3N2ZyIgdmVyc2lvbj0iMS4xIi8+\"\/><\/span><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"manage infidelity\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\"\/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"manage infidelity\" src=\"https:\/\/medicoplus.com\/_next\/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fplustatic.com%2F6675%2Fgestionar-infidelidad.jpg&amp;w=1280&amp;q=75 1x\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\" loading=\"lazy\"\/><\/noscript><\/span><\/p>\n<\/picture><figcaption>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<h3>5. Sincerity<\/h3>\n<p>Honesty with your partner is always a crucial ingredient in resolving conflicts between the two of you, and the appearance of an infidelity is no exception. <strong>Talk to her about the situation, why she decided to do it, and her reasons<\/strong>.  Although the reasons he may give you do not justify that he has broken your trust, talking about it can help you to analyze what may have gone wrong in the relationship to get to a situation like this.  If you consider the possibility of maintaining your relationship despite the infidelity, this point will be crucial so that you can overcome the situation without grudges or anger.<\/p>\n<h3>6. Know the reality without hurtful details<\/h3>\n<p>When an infidelity occurs, it is important that you can know for sure what has happened.  Not knowing exactly what happened can lead you to feel a lot of uncertainty and this will not allow you to overcome infidelity and turn the page.  This does not mean that you have to know hurtful or unnecessary details.  There are information that, far from making you feel better, can harm you.<\/p>\n<h3>7. Reflect with your partner<\/h3>\n<p>As we have been commenting, overcoming an infidelity is a very difficult process that is not possible in all couples.  It is crucial that, <strong>If you consider the possibility of continuing with your sentimental partner, reflect with him the viability of this option<\/strong>.  Turning the page after one of the two has been unfaithful requires doing an exercise in true forgiveness, in which the couple starts from scratch without resentment or reproaches regarding the past.<\/p>\n<p>Advancing as a couple requires putting aside resentment to give yourself a second chance, in which the member who has been unfaithful agrees not to make this mistake again.  The part of the one who has been deceived is not easy at all, since staying together is not compatible with \"I forgive, but I do not forget.\"  Authentic forgiveness is one in which the issues of the past are not brought up again, since a relationship based on reproaches and revenge is doomed to failure.<\/p>\n<p>It is very common that, in those relationships that try to stay after an infidelity, the one who has been cheated takes a dominant role in which he makes sure to continually remind the other of what he did.  This dynamic is very harmful for both and is totally incompatible with maintaining a healthy relationship. <strong>If you don't see yourself capable of starting from scratch, consider ending your relationship<\/strong>.  Prolonging it longer than necessary will only lengthen the suffering.<\/p>\n<h3>8. Seek professional support<\/h3>\n<p>Sometimes following the guidelines we have discussed may not be enough.  Not all people have the same ability to digest infidelity and, furthermore, not all infidelities are the same.  It is not the same to discover that our partner has had a specific slip than to know that he has been cheating on us for years.<\/p>\n<p>Nor will it be as easy to assimilate that we have been unfaithful with a stranger than with another person in our environment where there may be feelings in between.  All this can lead us to need an extra help, <strong>for which it is ideal to go to the psychologist<\/strong>.  This professional can help you handle the situation in the healthiest way possible.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"\"><picture>\n    <span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:inline-block;overflow:hidden;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;position:relative;max-width:100%\"><span style=\"box-sizing:border-box;display:block;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0;max-width:100%\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" style=\"display:block;max-width:100%;width:initial;height:initial;background:none;opacity:1;border:0;margin:0;padding:0\" alt=\"\" aria-hidden=\"true\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMTUwMCIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxMDAyIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciIHZlcnNpb249IjEuMSIvPg==\"\/><\/span><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"psychotherapy infidelity\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\"\/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"infidelity psychotherapy\" src=\"https:\/\/medicoplus.com\/_next\/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fplustatic.com%2F6676%2Fpsicoterapia-infidelidad.jpg&amp;w=1280&amp;q=75 1x\" decoding=\"async\" data-nimg=\"intrinsic\" style=\"position:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0;border:none;margin:auto;display:block;width:0;height:0;min-width:100%;max-width:100%;min-height:100%;max-height:100%\" loading=\"lazy\"\/><\/noscript><\/span><\/p>\n<\/picture><figcaption>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<h2>Conclusions.<\/h2>\n<p>In this article we have talked about how to manage an infidelity.  Assimilating that our partner has been unfaithful to us is not an easy task.  Pain and disappointment in the first moments are normal, but it is important to adopt some guidelines to handle the situation in the healthiest way possible.  Not all infidelities are the same and not all people conceive of this phenomenon in the same way.<\/p>\n<p>This means that <strong>Each couple is different and not all of them will be able to stay together after one of the two has been unfaithful.<\/strong>.  Regardless of the final decision, it is important to take time to reflect, take care of the routine and daily activities, lean on those close to you and, if necessary, seek professional help.  It is also decisive to put blame aside and not look for a defect or fault in ourselves that could justify what happened.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<div class=\"kk-star-ratings kksr-auto kksr-align-center kksr-valign-bottom\"\n    data-payload='{&quot;align&quot;:&quot;center&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:&quot;6018&quot;,&quot;slug&quot;:&quot;default&quot;,&quot;valign&quot;:&quot;bottom&quot;,&quot;ignore&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;reference&quot;:&quot;auto&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;count&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;legendonly&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;readonly&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;score&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;starsonly&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;best&quot;:&quot;5&quot;,&quot;gap&quot;:&quot;4&quot;,&quot;greet&quot;:&quot;Rate this post&quot;,&quot;legend&quot;:&quot;0\\\/5 - (0 votes)&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;24&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;How to manage an infidelity?  8 tips to get over it emotionally&quot;,&quot;width&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;_legend&quot;:&quot;{score}\\\/{best} - ({count} {votes})&quot;,&quot;font_factor&quot;:&quot;1.25&quot;}'>\n            \n<div class=\"kksr-stars\">\n    \n<div class=\"kksr-stars-inactive\">\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" data-star=\"1\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" data-star=\"2\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" data-star=\"3\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" data-star=\"4\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" data-star=\"5\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n    \n<div class=\"kksr-stars-active\" style=\"width: 0px;\">\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n            <div class=\"kksr-star\" style=\"padding-right: 4px\">\n            \n\n<div class=\"kksr-icon\" style=\"width: 24px; height: 24px;\"><\/div>\n        <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n<\/div>\n                \n\n<div class=\"kksr-legend\" style=\"font-size: 19.2px;\">\n            <span class=\"kksr-muted\">Rate this post<\/span>\n    <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of the most complicated situations that a couple can go through&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6019,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6018","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6018","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6018"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6018\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6019"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6018"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6018"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/enorcerna.com\/wiki\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6018"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}